I just finished building a new machine with several of the parts you have mentioned, so I'll add my thoughts on those items:
1.)is the sonata better than the bqe?
I've got the Sonata case and am very impressed with it. I just looked at the online info about the BQE for comparison. They are quite similar cases, with the exception that the Sonata's finish might be nicer (if that matters to you), and the Sonata's PSU is a bit better (380W versus 350W, and TruePower series which is better than SmartPower). That's not to say that the SmartPower 350S won't be enough for your system, just that those are the main differences I see between the two cases.
3.)should i get msi neo platinum motherboard?
I've got one of these in my new system as well, and love it. It's been solid as a rock thus far, and has performed very well in the various benchmarks I've run. Can't think of a single reason not to recommend it.
5.)should i get the ice q 9800 pro or should i spend the extra 40 bucks and get the 256 ddr 256 bit 9800 pro?
I don't know anything about this "Ice Q", but I've got a normal 9800 Pro in my new system, and it is easily the loudest thing in the box. Anything that would keep the videocard noise down would probably be worthwhile if quietness is a major issue (which it must be if you are asking around here).
I got the 256MB version because it was only a few bucks more for me than the 128MB version, and because the 256MB version of the card may be more easily flashed into an XT model from what I understand. But when comparing stock cards, the extra memory of the 256MB version doesn't seem to offer any performance benefit, as others have said.